Parents whose children experienced peer violence appeared visibly upset and shaken during interviews. These were not isolated incidents but repeated events that persisted, with varying degrees of intensity, for years. One mother of two, after her children endured various forms of peer violence during their primary school education, decided to transfer them to another school. She explained: My children no longer want to attend their class, and as a parent, I have had enough. For years, I have been warning schools to take the issues arising among children seriously, but it has led nowhere. Moreover, I have personally experienced ridicule and psychological bullying.
The children in question were targeted primarily due to their different ethnic backgrounds. For years, classmates called them derogatory names, including “Gypsy,” “stinking Gypsy girl,” “Serb,” and “Chetnik.” Despite their mother instructing them to report the abuse to school professional, whether a psychologist, pedagogue, or principal, no actions were taken. Instead, the children were further mocked, being labeled as ‘tattletale’. Their mother raised concerns about the general environment at the school, mentioning widespread frustration among pupils, early smoking habits (some starting as early as fourth grade), and even the presence of drugs. Yet, school staff failed to take her seriously. She recounted: The school began systematically harassing me with daily calls, detailing my child’s alleged misbehavior. My child received reprimands for disrespecting authority. These reprimands are handed out so indiscriminately that even the children laugh at them. However, the school’s professional services, like psychologists and pedagogues, have not established any trust with the pupils, who only approach them when forced to face consequences.
The mother recognized that children, including her own, are naturally lively and prone to occasional arguments. However, she felt systematic bullying crossed a line that should never be tolerated. Initially, she hoped the school would implement preventive measures, such as workshops on respecting diversity, interpersonal relationships, and empathy. She advised her children to avoid aggressive peers, but the lack of adequate responses to early warning signs allowed the violence to escalate. Name-calling evolved into physical threats, including an attempted attack with scissors. Eventually, an adult parent intervened inappropriately, causing a traumatic experience for the child. A forensic expert confirmed the trauma and recommended help, yet the school remained unresponsive, trying instead to cover up the incident.
The Center for Social Welfare became involved and filed a report. Meanwhile, the school pressured the mother to subject her child to a psychiatric evaluation. Though initially resistant, the mother eventually agreed, fearing the school’s referral to an official institution. She recalls how they told her that the diagnosis was certain and that they were “networked,” whatever that might mean. In this case, she is extremely grateful for the assistance of the Center for Social Welfare, which directed her to the Center for Community Services – Luka Ritz Counseling Center for her child’s psychological testing. After the initial psychological testing, the doctor determined that the child had above-average intellectual abilities and considered further cognitive testing unnecessary. However, at the mother’s repeated request, wanting to have all the paperwork for peace of mind at school, the doctor agreed to conduct the additional examination. In the end, in addition to confirming the previously established above-average intellectual abilities, the doctor stated in his professional opinion, that the child seeks to present themselves in a positive light, is sociable, composed, inclined towards peaceful problem-solving, and independent. The mother recounted another incident outside the schoolyard where her child was pelted with stones, as captured by school cameras. The school took no action, claiming the event occurred beyond their jurisdiction. In the end, a verbal conflict in which the child who was being insulted finally tried to defend themselves resulted in physical injury caused by the aggressor, who retaliated with a sharp object to a very sensitive area. There is medical documentation and a police report regarding the incident. In this case as well, it was not the school that called for emergency medical assistance and the police, but the mother. They reassured her by saying that everything was fine and that it was just a minor scratch, so reporting it to the police was unnecessary. However, when she arrived home with the child, he collapsed before her eyes. She took him to the children’s hospital for emergency care and then reported the entire incident to the police. The mother has extensive documentation for everything that happened, part of which includes medical documentation. In this most recent event, an inspection by the Ministry of Science and Education found irregularities in the school’s handling of the situation.
When I enrolled my children, the school was a healthy environment, the mother lamented. The former principal fostered respect and cooperation among staff and parents, celebrated pupils’ achievements, and prioritized school improvements. After her retirement, violence went unchecked, and parents like me, who spoke out, faced systematic pressure. Other parents supported me privately but were too afraid to voice their concerns publicly.
When the victim becomes the problem – Another example
A single mother shared her story of her daughter, who dropped out of her primary school after six years, due to relentless peer bullying, after which she enrolled in another school.
The girl faced years of teasing about her appearance, being called names that mocked her gender and sexual orientation. They mocked her by saying she looked like a boy, threw various words at her related to sexual orientation, and labeled her with names that she didn’t even understand at first. At first, the mother tried to encourage her daughter through conversation, but the bullying intensified. I raised the issue at parent-teacher meetings, but it was dismissed as trivial and something that would resolve on its own, she explained. The class teacher downplayed it, and I was labeled as someone creating unnecessary tension.
My daughter no longer wanted to go to school, she fell behind in her studies, and that was just an additional reason for her peers to isolate her. The teachers approached her with questions – why she wasn’t studying, what she thought about her grades, and told her that she needs to study more, implying that she was lazy. Despite the mother’s repeated pleas for psychological intervention, the school remained unresponsive. Mother became a problem because she was making excuses for her child, and the teachers started avoiding her. Communication was reduced to just a casual greeting in the school hallway and a lack of time for deeper conversation.
After one particularly abusive verbal incident, the girl began wearing a hood to school and refused to remove it during class. This act of defiance led the school to call her mother, branding the girl as the problem. Despite a psychiatrist confirming the girl’s normal intellectual and emotional health, the school continued to marginalize her. Her daughter’s behavior became a problem, but how it came to that no one was interested in. The mother didn’t know what to do for months. The situation reached a breaking point when the homeroom teacher openly criticized the girl in front of her classmates, describing her as strange and disruptive. Ultimately, the mother withdrew her daughter from the school, enrolling her in a new institution in which she is now finishing the eighth grade and finally found peace. They reluctantly remember everything they went through. The mother still talks about it, visibly shaken by the injustice and the lack of understanding from the system that should have been helpful in such situations and she does not talk about that period in front of the girl.
These parents’ stories, supported by extensive documentation, highlight a systemic failure in some schools to address peer violence adequately. The latest report by the ombudsman for children revealed that of 167 school violence reports in a year, 146 were cases of peer violence. Alarmingly, the report noted inconsistent responses from schools, while some apply all the regulations and professional interventions, others have not managed at all. We have received multiple complaints regarding the unprofessional behavior of school staff towards certain students, who, in disputes with their peers, showed support for the perpetrator, as stated in the Report. It adds: Some school staff also acted unprofessionally and incompetently when speaking with children and parents about the specific incident in a manner that did not help calm the situation, but instead caused even greater distress and anxiety.In that same report, the children convey: There should be a special social subject in school that focuses on ways to protect children from violence. It would be good to listen to them, while prevention still exists as a much stronger measure than repression.
The publication of this text was supported by the Electronic Media Agency as part of the program to encourage journalistic excellence
